Loving You is Lasting

Time is fleeting. There is nothing perpetual in this world and everything has its end. Important persons in our lives which we dearly and deeply love may pass in various ways. Others will leave in search for happiness, luck and good future. Some will depart ways by breaking the bonding to realize their worth and finally seek what they’re heart longs for. And what’s more distressing and heartbreaking to know if somebody has to leave because of unbearable sickness which you knew eventually will lead to someone’s death. Some easily accepts the reality of death but for others it is an infuriating subject to talk about for a reason that they’re simply not prepared or has not completed yet their purpose in life. It is also because the inevitability and finality of death was one of the more disturbing of many troubling questions which is quite hard to accept.

Much of the pain of death for the living comes from a sense of loss. Death is undoubtedly a subject which I avert to share my points of view in a discussion. Losing my loving sister because of her stage 4 lung cancer is absolutely a setback to my family more so to her young kids. When I had my vacation to Philippines it was she that I long for to see. When I saw my sis I hug her tight and my tears begun to fall on her shoulder because of years that were physically afar. My tears fell continuously as I was staring at her fragile body which was consummated by her terminal cancer. I have witnessed her courage in fighting to survive from cancer for the sake of her young handsome kids. Though she was in inexplicable anguish pain, she never showed to us her fragility in dealing with her disease but rather she was so determined to surpass her ordeal and be with her kids till they finally fulfill their dreams.

I never had a pinch of regret when I spent most of my vacation in the hospital to look after my sister and deferred leisure which I could have enjoyed as a treat to myself after years of being afar from my family. But the thought of that never crossed my mind for my foremost priority then is to spend my time and attend to her medical needs. Gone are the days, her condition became serious which was manifested with the losing of hair and intermittent seizure. Days passed we’re becoming afraid that she might not surpass her depressing predicament but we the spectators of her condition are in denial that she’ll be able to recuperate and regain her hopes to live a longer life.

Time has come that I need to go back abroad and it was indeed a saddening moment to leave my sister. Before I bid my goodbye, I whispered to her how much that I love her and promised that I would take good care of her children and exceed the love she had shown to them as a single mother. I should have not leaved her. I should have stayed till her last breath. My conscience keeps haunting me. Until now I couldn’t accept the fact that she has passed away and I won’t have a sister that I could count on.

I have realized that we should not wait for a serious situation comes in to express our love. Say I love you as often as you could and show it by means of doing good deeds to your family, to your love one and to the special persons closest to us.

The passing of my sister marks an end to all the possibilities both for us and for the departed that might have been realized by a longer life. I have realized that I must recognize that we have no measure by which we can judge whether it was better for her to have lived a longer or that matter a shorter life.

Today, August 29 is her birthday and i know that its quite different for my family especially to her kids to celebrate my sister's bday withouth her real presence. Despite of that, members of my family remembered this special occasion and prepared native delicacies as she always wanted to have during her bday.

Wherever she was now, I would like to let her know that I LOVE HER SO MUCH and MY LOVE WILL NEVER FADE AND IT WILL FOREVER BE LASTING.